Conversations Between Gil and Cal

Gil: Hey Cal, what's up?
Cal: Nuthin, just playin some sports.
Gil: I can see that. Nice shot.
Cal: What's that supposed to mean?
Gil: What's what supposed to mean?
Cal: You know damn well what I'm talking about.
Gil: Um, actually I don't. I said, "Nice shot" and you flipped out.
Cal: There you go again, being all condescending.
Gil: What are you talking about? How am I being condescending?
Cal: Oh come on, you're the SMART one, you should know how you're being condescending.
Gil: Well geez, I'm sorry if I sounded condescending.
Cal: You know, it's that attitude right there that makes me want to bust a cap in your face.
Gil: It's "ass," Cal.
Cal: You know, it's that attitude right there that makes me want to bust an ass in your face. That can't be right.
Gil: The expression is bust a CAP in your ASS.
Cal: Why would you want to shoot someone in the ass when you could shoot them in the face?
Gil: I don't know, maybe it's a humiliation thing. Like, if you shoot a guy in the face, they're pretty much dead, but if you shoot them in the ass it's kinda like the ultimate insult. And they have to think about it every time they sit down.
Cal: But what if you shot the girl in the cheek so the bullet just tore a hole in her cheek but didn't go into her head or anything? Like what happened at the end of Fight Club. He shot himself in the cheek, right? And he was OK?
Gil: Your creepy misogynous tone notwithstanding, yes, I think that's what happened in Fight Club. Edward Norton shot himself in the cheek and while it left him disfigured, it killed Brad Pitt, with whom Norton shared a body.
Cal: Shared what body? Helena Bonham Carter? Yeah, they really did share her body I guess.
Gil: No, I mean they shared one body.
Cal: Yeah, Helena Bonham Carter.
Gil. Geez, no, I mean they inhabited the same body.
Cal: Oh I get it. Hey, Gil, you know that girl Sarah I told you about.
Gil: Yeah.
Cal: I inhabited her last night. Twice!
Gil: Goodbye, Cal.
Cal: What did I say?